Blessed Ambiguity

As a white American male, I can only be humbled by this quote from Womanist Musings:

"The oppressor does not get to tell the oppressed what is and isn’t oppression. I know that the victor traditionally writes history, but just for shits and giggles, how about you pretend that the subaltern can speak. I don’t want to hear about the ways that you identify with me, because you cannot. I don’t want to hear your comparisons of my life to yours, because they are not the same. My struggle will never be the same as yours, and your attempts to diminish it by trying to find a reference point in your life, only makes the degree of privilege with which you function even more obvious."

Wow.

As I continue through seminary and internship, I have given a lot of thought to the differences between my own Lutheran faith tradition and those newer American faith traditions (i.e. non-denominational, evangelical) that seem to be the major image of Christianity in today's media.  I am deeply proud of the tradition in which I have been raised and trained, but am also frustrated at certain points.  I am frustrated that I can't find good sermon podcasts from mainline churches (except for here), while evangelical sermons (often, though not always, with terrible theology/homiletics) abound on the web. 

I could go on and on about how I struggle to find a balance between deep Lutheran (i.e. liberal/mainline/contextual/missional/confessional/dialectical/liturgical) theology and yet remain "relevant" (whatever that means) in today's culture. 

And so I found this comparison between mainline and non-denominational churches quite interesting.  This former pastor from non-denominational church traditions visits and compares his thoughts on the two distinct American streams of faith.

Like most red-blooded American males, I have always thought of Mother's Day as a sentimental card- and chocolate-giving holiday encouraged mostly by the minds of Hallmark.  So it was good to be reminded of the history of Mother's Day.  That it was begun by Julia Ward Howe, a pacifist suffragist in 1870 as a call for women's liberation and empowerment.  Here is her original Mother's Day Manifesto:

Arise, then, women of this day!
Arise, all women who have breasts,
Whether our baptism be of water or of tears!

Say firmly:
"We will not have great questions decided by irrelevant agencies,
Our husbands will not come to us, reeking with carnage, for caresses and applause.
Our sons shall not be taken from us to unlearn
All that we have been able to teach them of charity, mercy and patience.
We, the women of one country, will be too tender of those of another country
To allow our sons to be trained to injure theirs."

From the bosom of the devastated Earth a voice goes up with our own.
It says: "Disarm! Disarm! The sword of murder is not the balance of justice."
Blood does not wipe out dishonor, nor violence indicate possession.
As men have often forsaken the plough and the anvil at the summons of war,
Let women now leave all that may be left of home for a great and earnest day of counsel.

Let them meet first, as women, to bewail and commemorate the dead.
Let them solemnly take counsel with each other as to the means
Whereby the great human family can live in peace,
Each bearing after his own time the sacred impress, not of Caesar,
But of God.

In the name of womanhood and humanity, I earnestly ask
That a general congress of women without limit of nationality
May be appointed and held at someplace deemed most convenient
And at the earliest period consistent with its objects,
To promote the alliance of the different nationalities,
The amicable settlement of international questions,
The great and general interests of peace.

This video makes me sad.  Though we've come a long ways, we have much further we need to go.  How can I, as a male leader in the church, help women to find their voice?

This report from Bill Moyers gives a wonderfully horrific account of the lead up to the war in Iraq.  Check out the entire thing at http://www.truthout.org/docs_2006/042707H.shtml

So I haven't posted in a really long time.  But I began thinking this week, as we dive head-first into Holy Week about what it means to be a pastor in these services.  Tomorrow is Maundy Thursday.  The congregation where I am interning practices foot-washing each year on this night.  It's a practice that I really like and, as we discussed in our weekly pastor's text study, it has a very sacramental aspect to it.  In fact, Jesus even commands it in John's Gospel.

But what I am struggling with is the whole "servant leadership" phenomenon.  I feel like it is all to easy for this practice to become an ego trip for church leaders, but under the guise of servanthood.  As I have been preparing this week, I did a Google image search for footwashing, and was amazed at the number of photos that depict pastors and priests washing people's feet.  What I was really struck by in these photos was my own reaction.  I did not see them as wonderful models of slaves, taking the burdens of the people on their own bodies.  I didn't see them as ones who were in the trenches with the people, willing to truly bear death.  I saw them as false, self-edifying elites who put up this really "nice," "clean" image of the church.  They look more like they are trying to say (I hope not consciously) "Just as Jesus washed the feet of his disciples, so I wash your feet.  You should look to me as Jesus in my clean white alb, cleaning up all you sinners."

Now, I know I'm exaggerating here.  I realize that I am projecting my own thoughts onto these innocuous photos.  And I also know that the church is a human institution, and that whatever wonderful practices we may use are bound to get tied up in human messiness and pride and spiritual ruts.   And so I pose this question(s):  As people who are members of the body of Christ, and who have been called and hired as leaders in the church, how do we use these ancient, sacramental practices in a way that doesn't make them about us?  How do we recognize the messiness of this practice in our germ-phobic, comfort-centered society?  And how do we make this meaningful to the people in our congregations?  Is simply acknowledging our own brokenness where we need to begin?

Who ever said that Minnesotans aren't good baseball fans? Check out this footage from the 1991 World Series and you can see the Metrodome and downtown Minneapolis erupt with joy at the winning of game 7. Kirby will be remembered for his great play and personality that won both games and the love of his fans.

National Public Radio has an interesting piece on a project that takes the sounds of the Lower East Side of NYC and mixes them into a recording. It's quite a well-done take on the "ordinary" sounds of every day city life. Thanks to The Corner for pointing to this. You can find this project at Folk Songs for the Five Points.

SoMa has an interesting commentary on President Bush's faith and how he claims to have a pipeline to God. It is an intriguing look at how arrogance in knowing God's will can lead to disasterous consequences.

Once upon a time on Tralfamadore there were creatures who weren't anything like machines. They weren't predictable. They weren't dependable. They weren't efficient. They weren't predictable. They weren't durable. And these poor creatures were obsessed by the idea that everything that existed had to have a purpose, and that some purposes were higher than others.

These creatures spent most of their time trying to find out what their purpose was. And every time they found out what seemed to be a purpose of themselves, the purpose seemed so low that the creatures were filled with disgust and shame.

And, rather than serve such a low purpose, the creatures would make a machine to serve it. This left the creatures free to serve higher purposes. But whenever they found a higher purpose, the purpose still wasn't high enough.

So machines were made so serve higher purposes, too.

And the machines did everything so expertly that they were finally given the job of finding out what the highest purpose of the creatures could be.

The machines reported in all honesty that the creatures couldn't really be said to have any purpose at all.

The creatures thereupon began slaying each other, because they hated purposeless things above all else.

And they discovered that they weren't even very good at slaying. So they turned that job over to the machines, too. And the machines finished up the job in less time than it takes to say, "Tralfamadore."

-Kurt Vonnegut The Sirens of Titan

After watching L.A. Confidential I was struck by the similarities to Crash, especially in character development. In both movies the characters are well-developed. None of the characters are able to escape from the situations in which they live, nor are they able to escape their own pasts. However, in L.A. Confidential there is a little more hope in the characters (even though most of them end up being killed). They all search for truth in their lives and approach this truth from the realities of their own situations. It was interesting to watch the differences between Jack Vincennes, Bud White and Ed Exley. They each begin with vastly different motives and drives, but somehow find their way together toward the pursuit of a common cause. It makes me think that this is how the church often works. We come from all over the place: liberal and conservative, rural and urban, and we come together for the sake of God and creation. This process is always a little messy and we can never quite agree on how this is best done, but nevertheless we do our best.

While reading The Rake the other day, I read about this cool blog called Minnesota Stories. It is a video blog (or vlog) where people can submit their own videos; usually short, mini-documentary type films. It was started as a new way to "democratize production in a time of mass media conglomerates, and to create a sort of 'citizen channel' that is considerably more accessible than community access television." I think it looks like a really cool site that gives voice to many new voices. Check out especially I'm Still Dancin' and Raking Leaves. Incredible.

It appalled me this week to read about the latest pro sports scandal hitting our own backyards. With Vikings players allegedly taking pictures of lewd sex acts on a Lake Minnetonka cruise last week, does this not bring up images of the ending of "Requiem for a Dream"? What sort of misguided (not to mention dangerous) sexual impulses are at work in our culture that leads to this exploitation? It absolutely sickens me.

"Requiem aeternam dona eis, Domine,
et lux perpetua luceat eis."
(Grant them eternal rest, Lord,
and let perpetual light shine on them.)

So begins Mozart's Requiem. (Click Here for Music Sample) A text that only in hope and faith can have meaning in such a dark place. I have seen Requiem for a Dream before, but did not quite remember just how depressing, disturbing, dark and yet eye-opening this film was. I sat speechless as the ending built up and the tensions grew and grew.

Both this movie and Insomnia (I accidentally watched the original Swedish version, same storyline, just different actors speaking a different language) were sides of humanity that are so real and depict such suffering that they are difficult to watch. One can't help but feel the entrapment of the characters in Requiem..., and neither can one truly blame the investigator for his cover-up (at least not at first). It is as if the characters in both movies had truly become slaves to their pasts (in bondage to sin, as we Lutherans like to say) and in their struggles to free themselves only dig deeper into their own holes.

I do not want to offer cheap advice or theological declarations from my own vantage point of privilege, but somehow need to acknowledge the truth in these movies and find ways of engaging this suffering for the sake of healing (both within myself and in the world). But how does one begin?

This week's class discussion and video on commercial media was very interesting to me and reminded me of how pervasive (invasive?) commercial media is on our lives. In college I took a number of classes that looked at how [mass commercial] media changes our perceptions about who we are and I think that is still true. This problem is so widespread and complex that I am still at a loss as to what we are able to do about it. I've gone all over the board in attempts to fix the problem myself: not eating at McDonalds, not buying products that use sexist advertising, and on and on. Yet none of this has really seemed to change anything (I don't know why). ;)

In class I tried to allude to how this problem is much deeper than simply shoddy advertising practices. I think it somehow goes down to the very level of how our culture works. We live in a country that puts economics at the center of everything. Whether or not a business or individual makes money (and how much money) is central to our idea of success. Granted, this is not true in every circle (hopefully not seminary), but is pervasive in our culture as a whole: especially at the level of government.

I don't know how to fix this, or even if we can. Maybe all we can do is trust in God's grace and preach a gospel message in which GOD loves us in spite of the fact that our socks aren't white and our rides aren't pimped.

So I watched 2001: A Space Odyssey the other night with Dan Lee, and I can't say that I was really that moved. Maybe I just didn't get it, but somewhere I missed the profound-ness of it. I get that Bowman was reborn into something new, but what sort of process was that? I don't know. My impression half the time was that Stanley Kubrick wanted to make this deep movie that would shock and awe its audience. But it was lacking in my book. I think "Finding God in the Dark" was a good companion for it, though, and Pugente offered some insight and questions that have been helpful in understanding the movie and thinking more about my own life. I look forward to some of the other movies and seeing where they take me in this journey.